Recorded - spring or summer, 1971
Released - July 1971
#1 for weeks of September 11, 18 and 25, 1971.
As much as I have strived for perfection with every blog entry, there are many times I have wished to go back and be tougher on some of my early reviews. Certain songs from the divided early 1960's got off rather easy upon my first reviewing. Take Steve Laurence's "Go Away Little Girl" for instance. I didn't exactly praise the song, but I should have been more blunt: It's a terrible song, that makes you feel highly uncomfortable after just one listen.
So you can imagine my disappointment that not only do I have to review a second version of the song, but it's one by Donny Osmond nonetheless. Now, Donny has redeemed himself in recent years, singing the iconic "I'll Make A Man Out Of You" from Disney's Mulan. But back in the early 1970's, he was a bubblegummy teen idol, loved by teenage girls and abhorred by teenage guys. Sound familiar? Just replace Donny with any modern day teenage male pop star.
Still, I shouldn't judge a book by its cover. Perhaps this cover version of "Go Away Little Girl" will come across as less creepy and stalker-ish as the original. Let's find out...
(...three listens later...)
Ugg...oh my...get me some ear bleach! I think we've hit a new low here on this blog. This song came out when Donny was 14, so I was HOPING his voice had matured by then. Now, I've already heaped praise on young Michael Jackson's voice. However, Donny isn't a Michael. There are numerous times when Donny sounds like he's either straining for the high notes or just plain screaming. It is extremely grating and unpleasant on the ears.
The music, oh god the instruments... It's all so schmaltzy and saccharine, taking all of the easy-listening pop elements and adding an overdose of kiddie pop. I feel downright embarrassed listening to this, not just for me, but for all those who were alive in 1971 and had to listen to this on the radio, or out of their little sister's record player. I don't know what else to say other than, it's downright scary that this reached the top spot for three weeks.
Final Verdict - Donny Osmond's version of "Go Away Little Girl" blends a painfully high pitched vocal with a music track that makes the music on a children's TV show sound like Metallica by comparison. This cover version of an already awful Steve Laurence version of the song takes the cake. This is the absolute worst song I've had to review so far. The scary thing is, things are about to get even worse as we go through the years...
Coming Up Next - "Maggie May" and "Reason To Believe" by Rod Stewart.
Until Next Time, I'm Dr. Rock and I wish that "Go away little girl" would go away, far away -
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